|
|
| The independent answer to your debt problems | login join |
|
losingtheP-Lot
| 16-07-2008 10:05 PM |
|
Joined: 16 Jul 2008 Posts: 1 | Hi I hope someone can help me out here..... I have been ignoring my debts for a number of years due to moving a few times (spent an extended while with a few different friends in spare rooms , and living room floors) I am now in a position where i want and I need to sort a number of old debts out. I work for my exwife and currently my pay varies very considerably I have just started seeing someone new and I really want to work things out so I can settle down and live a normal life again. My new girlfriend wants this too but is upset at how much debt I am in and having looked into Bankruptcy and IVA's is not impressed at the length of time it will take to sort them out. She doesnt want to wait 5-6 years in order for us to able to get a mortgage on a house and have the security she wants in order to have kids. My current salary isnt enough to get by even as a single guy and pay my debts my salary has been going down year on year as my ex reduces hers and my salary to keep the business going. I have been offered another Job at a garunteed salary of 30k with commission on top potentially taking over 45k...last year i grossed 13k.....my new girlfriend wants me to take the new job and sort out a debt management plan of my own....my ex wife thinks i should go bankrupt (she does not know about the job offer)...if i left the business which my ex wife owns with her new husband there is the potential it will fold her debts will catch up with her and then have a detrimental effect on my two kids who live with her.... Needless to say along the course of the past 5 years of accumulating debts I have suffered from depression and literally not been able to work at times and function at my full capability when i do turn up to work... I apparently have attachments to my earnings from old loans that i took out to try and maintain a lifestyle when my wages were first reduced. Is there a way to sort out a different way of paying these if i move employment? Also other debts that I have defaulted on are in the hands of debt collectors although I have never actually met one of these mysterious people who stick notices through my door you'd think in the course of 5 years they would catch me when i am in, i have never bothered ringing them and i have a box file of letters some unopened that I have been too depressed to open most of the time. My girlfriend managed to get me to open some up and i am probably in debt to the tune of 30k although most of that is interest probably . It is really hard to get to grips of where i stand or how best to go forward and thats without the history and the feeling of being torn in two. |
| DW George | 17-07-2008 11:06 AM |
|
Joined: 01 May 2007 Posts: 158 My Profile | Hi LTP Your girlfriend is right - you need to address your debt problems, but I disagree with her on time scales. Short of bankruptcy, there is no quick fix for you. The debts, I guess, accumulated over a long period of time so to expect a short term fix is unreasonable. Your wife's business is not really your responsibility, but your children are. Do your children want a depressed and stressed out dad who can't relax when they see him? So don't worry about the financial issues which may or may not happen if you leave your wife's business. If their business solely relies on you then it is not a viable business or the wrong people are running it. Don't sit about waiting for your wife to close the business, making you redundant! Turning to your debts, your options are debt management, debt consolidation or insolvency or win the lottery. Assuming your luck's not in then the others will depend on your creditors and you. Debt managment is really only good for a short term fix, say a couple of years, until your finances are back on an even keel. However, you are not protected from creditors taking formal action against you, unless you live in Scotland. Debt consolidation obviously does not get rid of the debt, but combines all the debt into cheaper more manageable repayments. However, you may struggle to get a cheap loan if your credit score is knackered. IVA or bankruptcy? IVA's take 5 years and by the end of it your debts will be written off and the slate cleaned. Bankruptcy lasts only a year and your debts will be written off but there are certain restrictions. Losing the Plot, you need to do what is best for you, not your girlfriend, not your children and not your wife, but for you. If you are sorted both financially and mentally then you can rebuild your life which will benefit your children and your girlfriend. So it's easy :) sort your debts, sort your life. Hope this helps and post back if you need more info. George |
| helpmenow | 17-07-2008 09:28 PM |
|
Joined: 15 May 2007 Posts: 31 My Profile | Hello LTP I don't really have expert advice to give of a technical nature but can tell you from experience that dealing wih your debt is the best thing you can do in your situation. I know how grumpy and stressed I got about my debts. Regardless of timescales I when I started actually dealing with my debts rather than talking about them I started to feel better and also sleep a lot better. I signed an IVA, and although it is not easy, I know that if i keep to my repayments I will be debt free in nearly four years which spurs me on. I have read on other forums that the downside of an IVA is that you can't get any credit, I look at this as a good thing. I am sick of credit companies trying to get me into more debt. I am now learning to live without credit and spending within my means. It means that I don't go on holiday as often as I did nor eat out as often but I feel so much better about myself. Regardless of what road you go down dealing with your debt make sure that you stick to your plan and once you are debt free stay debt free. Hope everything works out. If you need some support or encouragement or even feeling down just post ba. HMN |
